First of all, I would like to apologize for the lack on content in the last two weeks. I was busy preparing for Grand Prix Charlotte and then I got sick. Hopefully, I won't be missing any more weeks.

A couple of weeks ago, I had the opportunity to play in the largest Magic tournament ever held: Grand Prix Charlotte. It was an amazing experience that I will not soon forget. But it also made me stop and think about Magic and what it means to me. So today, we are going to get a little introspective and hopefully I can pass along some wisdom in the process.

In the beginning...

I've been playing Magic a long time. I started when I was 13 and I turn 30 this year. That's over half of my life for those weak in the math area. When I first started playing Magic, it was just a game like any other game I played. I had always been a gamer, but I had never really found anyone who shared interest into the types of games I liked. Then, I started high school and found people who actually played Magic, and a whole new world was opened to me.

For my first two years of high school, my Magic experiences were mostly with the people I went to school with. Before my junior year, though, I changed schools and nobody at my new school played. That's when I decided to start going to the local game shop more. I started hanging out there on Saturdays and playing in their tournaments. At the time, it felt like I was stepping into the big leagues. I definitely started getting better and I started realizing how much more there was.
I started making new friends. These were people who were interested in the same things I were and I could really connect with. Some of these people are still my friends today (and even write for this site). Through these people I discovered other games as well, and I started to really get involved more.

Branching Out

Those who know me best will tell you I like games. I will try pretty much any game at least once. Right now, while writing this article, I'm having to bear down and focus to prevent me from just playing a game instead of finishing this. But in addition to liking games, they will tell you I'm a very competitive person. Some times, I may even be too competitive. At the time I was unaware of just how strong my competitive nature was.

Over the next few years, I started playing more and more games. Eventually, Magic started taking a back seat to the other games I enjoyed. I played Star Wars CCG, Pokemon, Legend of the Five Rings, Legend of Seven Seas, Lord of the Rings CCG, WWE Raw Deal, and even the .hack CCG. I didn't spend as much time playing Magic, because I was having fun playing all of these other games.
I even went so far as to become a tournament organizer for my local store. I have ran tournaments for most of the games on the above list. I did this to ensure that there was an opportunity for us to play. I realize now that this was so I would have a way to express my competitive nature. How could I be the best if there wasn't some way to prove it? So I made sure there was always a tournament of some kind on Saturdays.

Full Circle

For those of you who know anything about the gaming industry, you know that most of the games I mentioned above have died out over the years. When that happened, I turned back to Magic. I started running Friday Night Magic for my local shop and it was a huge success. I started really getting back into Magic.

This was when I really started to feed my competitive appetite. I started attending major Prereleases, State Championships, PTQ's. I didn't always do well, but I had a few good runs at some of the events. Unfortunately, real life has a tendency to get in the way, and Magic had to take a back seat again.

However, I didn't fully let go. I kept up with new sets and played some online. I still talked to my friends about Magic. I still played board games and other games. I just didn't have the time to dedicate to Magic the way I wanted to. Only now do I realize how much I missed it during this time.

A New Beginning

Around the time Innistrad came out, I was finally to a point where I could start to focus on Magic again. I took over running FNM for the local shop. I realized, I was a little older and little wiser, and I really started to feel the need to compete.
Since then, I have gone to great strides to improve my game and really get what I can out of Magic. I was able to Top 8 my first PTQ this past December. That was a really big achievement for me and helped me see that I really did have the potential to play this game at the highest levels.

This really hit home when I made Top 8 of a Star City Games Open. I knew then I could never turn back. Aside from marrying my wife, that was definitely one of my proudest moments. And then there was Grand Prix Charlotte. Not only did I make Day 2, but I was able to get wins against a couple of pro players a long the way.
Since then, I have thought a lot about Magic and I have finally started to realize everything Magic means to me. Everyone should have something in their lives that they love. Something they want to do well. Something they want to achieve. For me, this is Magic. I want to be able to look back in 20 years and say that I accomplished everything I possibly could while playing this game.

Reflection

This revelation has really focused me. I have started reading more Magic than ever before. I have started trying to test more and more thoroughly. I started writing about Magic. I've started thinking about the game in a different way now. Before, it was something I did in my free time with my friends. Now, it is what drives me.

I feel it is important for everyone to stop and reflect on Magic and what it is to them. Do you go to Friday Night Magic just to hang out with friends. Do you just want to sit around the kitchen table in a giant Commander game. Do you want to win the Pro Tour.

Its important to think about this because you can't make the most out of Magic, if you don't know what you want. For me, it's the need to chase the next victory. But it isn't the same for everyone. If that Commander game at your kitchen table is why you really play Magic, then maybe it makes sense why you don't have a lot of fun at PTQs.

That's all from me this week. Next week, I will start looking toward the SCG Invitational in Atlanta and my thoughts on the metagame.

Eddie Walker